Trust

I have had most probably the worst few weeks of my life. This is the first time in a while that I have felt even close to normal and the fact that I can even use my vision to type feels good. Basically I was put on to such a ridiculous dose of steroids to reduce my initial symptoms that my whole body went into shutdown. In the first instance I did not question this and I should have. This is my message tonight.A t the beginning of December I blindly allowed myself to be sent home on a dangerous dose of deadly drugs...because I was terrified of dying quicker than I was ready for. The steroids quickly changed everything about me and I knew in my heart that it wasn't right. Over these last weeks I have had to speak up and truly fucking fight to be heard (not easy when pretty much catatonic). I told the doctors that I believed that the steroids were the main harm to me and that I just simply would not take the dosage anymore and lo and behold I have been taken from 16mg per day down to 2. The difference I cannot explain, yes brain radiotherapy is leaving me with horrible head pains BUT I don't have literally dozens of other side effects which in all honestly had taken away every fibre of ME! That includes my personality. So tonight I feel well enough through my choices to continue to send the message that we must know our own bodies and not just be passive recipients of a truly vile drug cures all culture. TRUST your own instincts.